We can't stay happy for long, can we? I don't mean I'm unhappy per se, because I am happy in the most inconvenient, unexpected, weird way. I guess that's just me dwelling on the downside of the being away idea speaking. Not ranting here but It's been so long since I went through this whole restructuring ordeal and so sometimes I'm taken by the difficulty especially whenever I get the urge to talk to you but cannot. I'm still adjusting and right now, trying to place emotions in their proper places. Sometimes, it could really get frustrating and sad, to say the least. But it’s a welcome challenge, one that I easily permitted myself to embrace. When I said I am willing to take the risk, I meant plunging in with all what-nots. No I don't wanna doubt; it's not helpful at all. You've earned my trust albeit my not telling you that. But I just want you to remember that this is a two-way traffic, that there are things we have to prove in our own ways so we can survive all things else together. What I have been praying for since Day One, when I had the epiphany, the realization of the fact and its parallel possibilities is for the faith to help me through days like this, for the wisdom to know things so I wouldn't hurt myself, and for the hope that eventually the right time will come.
I made a promise and I have no intention to back out on it. But should I ever break it, I want to make sure that I've taken all means and measures to have prevented myself from doing so. As always, I'm waiting. My point is...I miss you.
Currently listening to: Always on my ind- Anoop Desai
Currently feeling: contemplative
Your touch is electric I felt it the first time you held me The way we connected So easily
I've tried to define it Searched for the perfect phrase I've tried to describe it In a million different ways
It's joy, it's ecstacy, it's truth, it's destiny And even love is not enough to tell you how you make me feel There's only one word for this
I've got to admit it You took my heart by surprise Don't know how you did it But baby, I've never felt so alive
It's joy, it's ecstacy, it's truth, it's destiny And even love is not enough to tell you how you make me feel There's only one word for this It's bliss
Hey, you know, baby, know what the future holds As long as you're here with me
It's joy, it's ecstacy, it's truth, it's destiny And even love is not enough to tell you how you make me feel
It's faith, it's honesty, it's life, it's everything To say "I love you"'s not enough to tell you how you make me feel
It's in your smile, in your kiss It's the reason that I exist There's only one word for this It's bliss
Lately, I don’t know why but I have
been eagerly listening to sappy sad love songs. I’m not bitter or
whatever.. I just appreciate how the message of the songs flows through
my cold veins as it pumps blood into my numb heart.
For now, I can attest to the saying that who can say why your heart cries, when your love lies.. only time.
Unconsciously, I can sleep well as I hit the sack after my shift. I
love seeing the sunshine as it peeks through the window of my bedroom.
I enjoy taking a nice looooonnng (take note: LONG ) shower and play
with my dresses in my closet.
The pain that I have been hiding from the whole world to see is long gone. I didn’t know when but it’s gone.
Whenever I try to remember the events that shattered my life, I just
laugh at myself for I never realized that I was too blinded by my
emotions. One thing I can say without any hesitations is I do not have
any REGRETS with what I had done in the past.
When we’re in-love, we do things way beyond what we normally do. We act as if there’s no tomorrow.. in short, insanity.
It’s really ironic but that is the bittersweet truth. The pain may
take forever to descend in my heart but only time will tell when will
it end… and it did!
If only the world knew what I had experienced, they will understand
why I decided to leave it and be on my own. Honestly? It’s shocking and
very traumatic for me. I learned a lot from all those things that
happened to me.
For now, I’m thankful that I managed to survive another adversity that once colored my life hue.
Currently listening to: If The Feelong Is Gone by Ella Mae Saison | Before I Let You Go by Freestyle | It Must Have Been Love by Roxette
Currently feeling: pensive
I woke up way too early yesterday. I believed I had slept around 12
MN then I got up at 3 AM. Well, I need to be at the office that early
because I’ll be seeing Ram and Cyril after their respective shifts. I
was at the office around 5:30 AM then Ram and I headed to SM Mall of
Asia to fetch Cyril. Around 6 AM, we were there at the mall to meet
Cyril.
However, Cyril had a call and he came out around 7:30 AM. Long call, huh?
First stop. We decided to grab a coffee at Starbucks while waiting
for Rose and Ella. It’s funny because while the Barista was trying to
build a rapport as we took our order, he just asked out of curiosity
and this line was the one I will never forget:
“So, you’re a balikbayan right?!”
We laughed out loud and I answered back, “Hindi ah, taga Imus lang ako. We’re currently working at Makati“.
Let these pictures do the talking. *winks!
I was kinda anticipating to see someone but I guess, we’re not meant to see each other during that day. o.O
Till next time guys and I hope complete attendance na tayo! =)
Currently listening to: Kahit Kailan by South Border
Currently feeling: loved
The heart knows no hiatus. It grows in silence. It is unaware of succession. It doesn't question. It helplessly beats for reasons unknown to the bearer, or it may be devoid of reason at all. Hence is associated with insanity, madness, blindness, folly. But something so beautiful and transcendental would definitely not be a product of stupidity. It is there. It exists. It is felt. It tries hard not to deceive its bearer. Resistance and denial only make a moron out of its bearer. It doesn't suggest profoundness. Happiness ought to be simple. Otherwise, only a few could afford understanding the meaning of joy.
coffee addict. film buff. music lover. hopeful romantic. ice queen. chocolate
lover. semi-hydrophobic. athena. feminist. somniloquist. former somnambulist. loves to wash the dishes. hates to ride on boats. enjoys the space shuttle ride. aquarius. dancer. solace. frustrated singer. sometimes misunderstood. eRep. mysterious. no boyfriend since birth. web surfer. dory. bob ong fanatic. obsessive-compulsive. secret agent. imperfect perfectionist. nocturnal. early bird. ironic. shock-absorber. poker face. loves greek mythology. stalker. dreamer. believer. survivor. starstruck (hehehe). fighter. altruistic. bitch. bakla. woman.
FEBRUARY
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislike unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious andludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.
AQUARIUS
You are from another planet and your unique idiosyncracies and trails of thought can woo a smitten crowd of worshippers. The clueless seem to think you're a little wacko but that's because thay can't ride on the brainwaves of a genius or appreciate your rice-sack-to-fashion-statement creation. You love meeting new people because you think you might learn something new or develop a new perspective in the process. It's easy to please you because you always see something wonderful in everybody and are generally open to finding love in the most bizarre places. From your friends and guy prospects (whose names are too many to jot down in your little black book), it's the bohemian types who are equally enthralled by adventure who tickle your fancy the most. Chocolates and romantic dinners intrigue you but friendship is the winning factor in keeping you bound to a relationship. The more space a relationship gives you to explore the world and be free, the more faithful you'll be.
"Hey Carl... you wanna give your money away to some homeless guy? Yes, yes I do. How bout letting him use up the phone battery so that you cant get help when your car runs out of gas? You know what? That sounds like a fuckin' great idea!"
- Jim Carrey as Carl Allen-
I'll miss you.
